First Date Ideas: 24 Easy Plans That Make Talking Simple

What is a good first date?

A good first date is public, short, and easy to end or to stretch. We suggest about one to two hours, with a shared thing to look at or do, so neither of you has to carry the conversation alone. Keep the cost low, so nobody feels they owe the other person anything.

Jastado is being built around questions about money, family, lifestyle, values and long-term goals. Join the waitlist for your city.

Why doing something together helps

A shared activity takes pressure off the talk and gives you both something to react to. In a set of studies by Arthur Aron and colleagues, couples who did a short, new and exciting task together rated their relationship higher afterwards than couples who did a dull task. Those couples already knew each other, and no study has tested first dates, so treat it as a reasonable guess that something new to do helps two strangers too.

The questions you ask still matter most. A 2017 study of get-to-know-you chats and speed dates found that people who asked more follow-up questions were liked more, and speed daters who did so got more yeses for a second date. So pick a plan that leaves room to talk.

Easy first date ideas

These suit almost anyone, cost little, and are simple to end after an hour or to stretch into an afternoon.

1. Coffee and a walk. Get a drink to go and walk through a park or a nice street. Walking side by side makes pauses feel natural. Keep a café in mind in case it rains.
2. A farmers market or food market. There's lots to look at, small things to taste, and an easy topic: "What would you cook with this?" Go early, because a packed Saturday crowd makes it hard to hear each other.
3. A bookstore and a café. Each of you picks a book the other should read, then you talk about why over coffee. Save the talking for the café if the store is very quiet.
4. Dessert instead of dinner. Ice cream, a bakery or a dessert bar is shorter and cheaper than dinner, with the same sit-and-talk feel.
5. A picnic in a busy park. Bring a few snacks each and turn it into a small taste test. Keep it simple, so the planning doesn't take longer than the date.

Active first date ideas

Doing something with your hands or feet helps when you're nervous, because you have something to focus on.

6. Mini golf. It's silly, a little competitive, and easy to laugh at your own bad shots, as long as neither of you takes the score too seriously.
7. Bowling. Turns between shots leave natural moments to talk. Some alleys play loud music, so pick a quieter time.
8. A beginner session at a climbing gym. You cheer each other on and learn something new together. Ask first, since one of you may not like heights.
9. Renting a pedal boat, kayak or bikes. A short outing with a clear start and end, in a busy public spot. It depends on the weather and on both of you liking the activity.
10. A table tennis bar or arcade. Low stakes and easy to joke about. Step outside or to a quieter corner when you want to talk.

Creative first date ideas

A class or a shared task gives you a story to tell later, and shows how the other person handles something new.

11. A one-off cooking or pottery class. You make something together and can laugh at the result. Check the length first, since some classes run long.
12. A museum or gallery. Ask each other which piece you'd take home and why. A small museum keeps the pace easy.
13. Trivia night at a bar or café. Play as a team of two and learn how the other person thinks. Leave time after the last round to talk about something other than the questions.
14. A paint or sketch night. Nobody expects good art, which takes the pressure off. Pick an open session over a strict step-by-step class, so there's room to chat.
15. A free walking tour of your own city. You both learn something, and you can chat between stops. Stay near the back of the group to talk.

Evening first date ideas

Evening plans feel more like a "real" date. Keep them short and in busy public places.

16. Live music in a small venue. Jazz, acoustic or local bands where you can still talk between sets.
17. A comedy show. You laugh together, then have something to talk about over a drink afterwards. Sit away from the front row if you'd rather not be part of the show.
18. Drinks or mocktails at a quiet bar. Simple and flexible, and you can leave after one drink. Pace the alcohol, so you can still judge how the date is going.
19. An outdoor film screening in a park. A new spin on the cinema. Meet for a drink before or after, since you can't talk during the film.
20. A night market or food truck event. Plenty of choices, walking and a lively crowd. Share one stand instead of each waiting in a different line.

Cheap or free first date ideas

A first date doesn't need to cost much, and a low cost also avoids an awkward moment about who pays.

21. A walk to a busy viewpoint in daylight, with a coffee on the way.
22. A free concert or festival in a public park, with a quieter spot nearby to talk.
23. A library or community event, such as a talk, a reading or a craft night.
24. Window shopping in a market or old town, with one cheap snack to share.

For things to talk about once you're there, see questions to get to know someone.

How to pick the right first date

Ask yourself three things, then choose from the list above.

1. How much time do you both have? If one of you has a busy week, pick something short like coffee and a walk. A class or a concert needs a free evening.
2. How well do you know each other? If you've only chatted in an app, choose something easy to end after an hour. If you've talked a lot already, an evening plan or a class can work.
3. What do you already know they like? Someone who mentioned they love food will enjoy a market. Someone who said they're shy may prefer a walk or a game, where you don't have to face each other the whole time.

An example: you've messaged someone for a week, they mentioned they bake, and you both finish work late on Thursday. A dessert spot after work fits: it's short, public, connected to something they care about, and easy to extend with a walk if it goes well.

First date safety basics

These are common precautions for meeting someone new. They lower risk, but nothing can guarantee safety.

• Meet in a busy public place and get there on your own, by your own car, a ride service or public transport.
• Tell a friend where you're going, who you're meeting and when you expect to be home.
• A short video call before the date gives you a first impression, but it does not prove who someone is.
• Keep an eye on your drink and stay sober enough to make your own choices.
• Leave whenever you want. You don't owe anyone a full evening.

Read our trust and safety page for more. If someone threatens you or you feel unsafe, call 911. The National Domestic Violence Hotline is free and confidential at 1-800-799-7233.

Common first date mistakes

• Planning too much. A full day out puts both of you under pressure. Keep the first one short and let the second date be longer.
• Choosing a plan with no time to talk. A film or a loud show is fine, but only with time to talk before or after.
• Spending too much. An expensive dinner can make the other person feel they owe you something, or make you resent it if the date goes badly.
• Treating it like a job interview. A list of questions fired one after another feels like a test. Ask one, listen, follow up, and share your own answers.

Summary

Pick a first date that is short, public and cheap, with something to do side by side. Use the time to ask questions and follow up on the answers, and save the big evening for a second date. Want a script for the table? Our guide to questions to ask on a first date covers what to ask before, during and after.

For what to say once you're there, read our questions to get to know someone, browse the deep conversation questions, and if it goes well, try our questions to ask your girlfriend or boyfriend later on.